An Orange Cloud

  I think we all want to be a broken clock some time. Let me explain.   Trail Of Thoughts - 18 Today I woke up and noticed that one of our wall clocks was not working. And I thought, “huh, to stop in time, must be a fantasy”. And my second thoughts were “I should get some batteries!”   The point is I wanted to be like a broken clock and stop in time. You know, have a break because all my batteries dried up.   The clock that was ahead of everyone for 10 minutes is now behind everyone and everything for 10 hours. And I liked that, and wished for it. I wanted to be behind everyone, take a long break and resume like nothing even happened. Resume, in the sense of picking up where i left off at that very moment and not days after.   I may have identified myself with the clock broken clock and wished to be on hold while I get a battery change. But until then, I’m defying all the laws of time and science. It’s not an escape of any sorts. Just a tiny li...

  Sto-rini- 14 It was back in 2019; I was studying 9th. The academic year had just begun and we were all breathing the air of relief because of the 8th class storm. We had public exams in 8th, our first exposure to outside correction and the new type of stress due to pressure.   9th class was our step to freedom after the battle. As storm passed, calmness spread. Little did I know, it was the sign for yet another storm that was to come, but this time it was coming for me.   "A new student has joined in 9th A", announced my class teacher, we got excited. I still remember that day, crystal clear. She waddled in, shy and sat behind me. On her first day, we swarmed around her introducing ourselves. I remember my first words to her, "Nice to meet you. My name is Rini".   We shook hands. It wasn't firm, she was rather weak. She was slim. Not too thin, not too fat. Just the right type. She had a fair complexion, clear skin, thick hair, smooth hands, beautif...

 The first time I actually try to use my heart Everything starts falling apart   I hate to be emotional Risking one thing for all   It’s scary how some people are like this On a daily basis   It’s scary how they handle it so well Few minutes through and I'm already in hell   Now I know why she was so hurt While she could leave it She held on to it   I thought she was crazy For being so attached to someone It’s a waste of time Might as well work hard in life   Waiting for hours for a reply And I text without an ounce of shame They’re probably busy I say while I deny That they probably don’t even remember my name   I hate to start the convo Hate to stay online I hate to be the only one To keep the convo going   But, I like you. I'm doing this for you   I hate it. I hate to say it I hate to admit it But I hate to deny it I hate to like you.   ~The End~ i wrote this back in 2021, i guess. i was emo back then. kind of an extra entj. i ha...

  Hey!   So insomnia struck me last night and I want to share the whole story.   Sto-rini - 13 the devil's number indeed Last night I was so sleepy so I went to bed a little earlier than usual. Usually I would hit the pillow and my brain kinda like shuts down, sometimes manual sometimes automatic. This time as well, as it was shutting down it didn’t feel like usual.   I shut down, but my thoughts kept on going and believe me when I say they make no sense. Like it’s a whole story and it keeps on moving not staying at one place. Once I would be in a spaceship hitting the asteroid and next I’m in lunch with some extra terrestrial creatures and planning for earth’s dooms day. This is not the weirdest shit yet, my head just hurt so much and I knew why too, because I’m thinking. It’s not even dreaming, I’m just thinking weird sh.   It’s as if my brain has become a whole different person and started thinking for its own. That scared me, more than anythi...

  My eyes feel heavy, I can’t feel my body. I feel like I’m dying. I woke up not knowing how I even fell asleep. Was it even sleep I have woken up from? But first, why does my whole body ache like crazy? I can’t even open my fucking eyes. With all my might, I open them slightly. First thing I see is red coloured sand. Just sand everywhere, red precisely. Red mountains, red sky, red sandstorms, red ground, and red …… liquid? Is that blood? Am I bleeding?? I feel a metallic taste in my mouth. It is blood. I try lifting my hands and they’re painted bright red. I have been hurt badly. Don’t know how, don’t know when, and don’t know why.   Wait, why don’t I remember why or how? I don’t remember anything. Why is that? I go deep into my thoughts and suddenly a memory snaps. A car accident. There was a car accident. Trying to remember more things despite the severe headache and huge blood loss, I remember one more thing. I was with my boyfriend, Siddharth, in the very car that was in ...

April fools! I mean if you read the last post till the end, I said I will be discontinuing but here I am. That was a prank (if anyone cared). Back to the post :-   Hey! I wrote this 2 months back but the emotion still remains raw and fresh. Have a good read; you might need a tissue because I did.   Sto-rini - 12   The end of the academic year has become quite clear now. It has become a close reality unlike far. We could all sense it. And with the end, there comes new beginnings? No, with the end comes many celebrations and exams; goodbyes and tears; confessions and regrets. I experienced two of them.   First the celebrations, the farewell our juniors presented to us was, in one word, ' MARVELOUS' . It is probably THE best one in the world (a bit far-fetched but let me have it ffs). They did it so well; I can still hear the cheers and sing-along. I danced, which is so unlikely to happen. I am super happy to be their seniors <3 and even happi...

DARK.  Yea that was supposed to be scary. I would recommend reading this at night.     Let the air come inside And shiver my spine Let me feel it Freeze my body   It’s dark outside I’m imagining in my mind That someone's watching But keeps disappearing   The curtain is moving Tube light is glowing The air is freezing Looks like it’s working The drug in the breeze That you put here   I hold my book like an armour Hoping it would protect me from you I know you're watching Tell me what's so interesting   One minute I see your head One minute I see your hands One minute I see you falling off the building One minute I see you flying   In the dark Into the dark Through the dark You  are the dark   I have been looking at you for an hour I still can't figure who you are   I was scared But now I'm not You just need a friend Because you're alone   Suddenly a lightning Revealing you to me I rub my eyes And you're already On your way to me...