An Orange Cloud

4-3-24   Trail Of Thoughts- 29 I always joke that when my friend dies, I will “borrow” her diary and read it. Like, binge-read it. It is so very weird and so intimate. But I really want to know what goes on in her   Universe.   Does she have the same stars As Me?   Does she also have a Curious astronaut Exploring the vast dark space with so much Pink glitter dust?   Does she also have planets in her solar system with her favourite homes in each of them?   Does she also associate new people she meets to old people she met?   Does she think of little perfect things in every corner of this large floating sphere?   Does she also love watching Disney movies, Maybe re-watching them?   Does she often think of Escaping the reality And meet up with her Curious exploring astronaut In a cute pink (baby pink) space suit?   Does she wonder about all the undiscovered planets , Waiting to be...

  I saw this movie yesterday, it’s called “gaami” and it was the most beautiful dystopian Telugu movie I have ever seen. This kind of dystopia, I think, is the first time in Telugu films. I loved it so much. I'm not one to watch movies or even write about one and if this movie got me reviewing it, you should understand it’s kind of a big deal to me. And to the movie too lol.   Sto-rini- 20   It all started when I first watched ted-ed’s video "  Why should you read "The Handmaid's Tale"? - Naomi R. Mercer  " and I was like “hmmm,  tell me why?  ?” I clicked on the video and it was the best video I’ve seen all day. It was 12 am, I searched on Google, “handmaid’s tale pdf free download”, and I clicked on the first reasonable  link  I saw and quickly switched off my wifi connection and made myself comfortable. Meaning I put my books away. I clicked on the pdf in my downloads folder and lo and behold my journey began. I was so excited the wh...

3-3-24 I should be studying now.   Trail of thoughts- 28   When I first bought a size 32 jeans, I was surprised. I was scared too. Why do I need a bigger pant? So I’m not just fat, I’m getting fatter now?   I hated the feeling. It lasted a while. When I wore them for the first time, the stormy tornado in my chest calmed down and a summer breeze hit my heart. It felt like a long drive down the bridge with the beautiful clear river on either side.   As I was processing it, my mind so confused, a smile was born on my face. My hands in the air, my hair in the breeze, the cycle floating down the bridge, it felt like a revolution.   The land I was leaving was so dark and thorny; it was full of fluffy colours but very so aching. I was almost always breathless and fearful of what might happen. The unpredictability ate up my mind and my mouth toothless.   The land I was so happily leaving, The land I no longer belong to, The land I no lon...

 I like to remember while my brain loves to forget. But it's fun because every time I try to remember something, I remember little details I 'missed' before. It adds to the beauty of the memory.    Trail Of Thoughts- 27 Written on 10 th Jan, 2024.   I completed my exams last week. A whole year’s work had me exhausted. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t tempted to sleep in the exam hall. I completed in an hour. Anyways, I was relieved but not as much as I thought I would be. I imagined that I’d be soaring with freedom as my wings, flying into the fluffy water floating above ground. I thought I would be happier, my life more colourful, like my vision would become like those toy camera- colourful, soft and lovely.   But I was wrong, well partially.   I did feel happy, the harsh cold weather felt like a breeze and my locks flew in it.   My vision did become like one of those toy camera, the visuals were soft, joyful, lovely, happy and i...

I can hang by the thread Or I can jump on my own But in the end I'll be falling on the ground   I'll flow with the river Never stay at the bank I'll flow into the ocean And never come/look back   I wanna sail like a pirate Fighting the chaos I never want to set back And become one of them   I want to keep sailing Until I reach nowhere Because reaching is not my goal But to move on from the chaos   There is a lot of fish in the sea I can find something to eat The land can't keep me sane The land can’t make me a pirate   I don’t care about the destination I only care that I'm leaving I don’t know where I'm going But I know I want to be leaving And I know I'd be happy   I want to leave the chaos Leave everything behind I want to sail in the ocean Till I see no light   And once the night comes I'll take some rest and Deal with all the emotions About the end   The pirate ...

  I like the way you smile It brights up the night   Your eyes are like Those starry nights   Looking deep into them I see a universe peeking back at me   There’s a whole different world Inside those dark orbs   Those which felt empty Seem to be filled with life   I can look into them for hours And not get bored   Those dark marbles Give life to the butterflies Flying around us Making this even more magical   I see pink hearts floating around And heart shaped clouds flying by I see cupid with its bow Ready to shoot the arrow And I am ready to fall so slow Into your warmth, golden yellow   The sizzling sun doesn’t matter anymore The burning ground is nothing at all The hot summer is a bummer for sure But I’m happy, as long as I can be with you me amor   You’re the love of my life My not so long existence But I still long for you For I need what is mine   ...

February, 2023     I’m drowning in my pills The water is my tears   I’m swimming in the red pool I regret cutting like a fool   2019 was a nightmare I wish I could forget that   I still remember that phase When I wished I didn’t exist   2020 was nothing better I thought I’d cope up but was hopeless   I was deeper in the well I was only sinking deeper   The red got redder My eyes wetter The place darker My sky clouded   I prayed to even see a flower In the garden of my graveyard   I watered with my tears I waited for it to sprout   Little did I know That the king gave me a dummy   It used to be bad But it only got worse ‘Time heals’ they say But the same time kills Even the sun rays   When I least expected it Everything went down the hill It’s like they’re planning for my doomsday But I am not even away       ...